It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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