Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize