Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize