so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
