umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
