Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
You don't make any sense
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