its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
