just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.