One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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