We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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