do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
