Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize