So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
