this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
