Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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