the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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