Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
