For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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