we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
