Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I knew I liked you

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  (202): I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later (410): I knew I liked you http://tfl.nu/yvq5
  Replies (37) Good night (4471) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice

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  (310): Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice http://tfl.nu/uvj1
  Replies (14) Good night (793) Bad night (3146)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.

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  (321): I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment. http://tfl.nu/8o3c
  Replies (18) Good night (3326) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes

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  (519): dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes http://tfl.nu/xjd2
  Replies (61) Good night (6351) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this

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  (218): he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this http://tfl.nu/jsty
  Replies (17) Good night (5069) Bad night (1281)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?

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  (906): Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over? http://tfl.nu/2cvh
  Replies (6) Good night (2637) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.

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  (330): No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/d0l1
  Replies (3) Good night (2185) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.

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  (573): Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI. http://tfl.nu/6uwa
  Replies (12) Good night (1726) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.

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  (979): Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties. http://tfl.nu/dl3v
  Replies (11) Good night (2146) Bad night (1027)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.

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  (605): I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become. http://tfl.nu/axq7
  Replies (4) Good night (1195) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder

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  (705): All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder http://tfl.nu/9ns2
  Replies (8) Good night (845) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.

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  (248): Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory. http://tfl.nu/ir2r
  Replies (1) Good night (543) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yesterday you said I was the best.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.

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  (570): Yesterday you said I was the best. (1-570): No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference. http://tfl.nu/was6
  Replies (3) Good night (716) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland

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  (774): Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland http://tfl.nu/km8l
  Replies (1) Good night (430) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone

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  (812): Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone http://tfl.nu/uhcq
  Replies (3) Good night (464) Bad night (96)

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