I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize