I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
