Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
