I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize