the condom got lost in my hair
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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