You can't motorboat a personality
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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