Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
