"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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