We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
