I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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