I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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