btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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