You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
