But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
