You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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