I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i love accidental penises.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
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