Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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