I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
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