theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
They have beer where we have blood.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
