Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
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