Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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