Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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