The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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