come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
