The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
