I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
