He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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