HIV tests are more positive than that guy
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
