I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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