nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
