OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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